1. Jacqueline was chosen as Pedestrian’s top 20 hottest picks for the festivals and didn’t even have to touch anyone’s genitals….she would have though if they were clean and asked politely.

2. Sink Full of Forks teaches you how to be your own knight in shining armour and compares breakups to being covered in a mountain of shit you have to slowly scrape off yourself. That’s fun, right?

3. Recommended for anyone suffering from bad skin who doesn’t need to be reminded of their condition by being asked “ What’s wrong with your face?” by strangers at a restaurant. Thanks C$%t!

4. Jacqueline is good at this, she likes doing this and would like to continue doing this for a long time and make enough money to be able to afford luxury items like toothpaste and potato gems.

5. Every show will be different because Jacqueline’s anxious little brain likes to jump around and distract her like a designer dog with a heart condition.*

*Still not convinced? Here’s my showreel to help you decide. https://youtu.be/mzGHTyS9w6o